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Friday, January 9, 2009

Three Little Words

There are many things that we can do to perk up and strengthen our interpersonal relationships. Yet the most effective involves the saying of just three words. When spoken or conveyed, these statements have the power to forge new friendships, deepen old ones and restore relationships that have cooled. The following three-word phrases can enrich every relationship and make a lot of difference in one's life.

I'll Be There
If you have ever had to call a friend in the middle of the night, to take a sick child to hospital, or when your car has broken down some miles from home, you will know how good it feels to hear the phrase "I'll be there." Being there for another person is the greatest gift we can give. When we are truly present for other people, important things happen to them and us. We are renewed in love and friendship. We are restored emotionally and spiritually. Being there is at the very core of civility.

I Miss You
Perhaps more marriages could be saved and strengthened if couples simply and sincerely said to each other "I miss you." This powerful affirmation tells partners they are wanted, needed, desired and loved. Consider how ecstatic you would feel, if you received an unexpected phone call from your spouse in the middle of your workday, just to say "I miss you".

I Respect You
Respect is another way of showing love. Respect conveys the feeling that another person is a true equal. If you talk to your children as if they were adults you will strengthen the bond and become close friends. This applies to all inter-personal relationships.

Maybe You're Right
This phrase is highly effective in diffusing an argument and restoring frayed emotions. The flip side to "Maybe you're right" is the humility of admitting, "Maybe I'm wrong". Let's face it. When you have a heated argument with someone, all you do is cement the other person's point of view. They, or you, will not change their/your stance and you run the risk of seriously damaging the relationship between you. Saying "Maybe you're right" can open the door to further explore the subject, in which you may then have the opportunity to get your view across in a more rational manner.

Please Forgive Me
Many broken relationships could be restored and healed if people would admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness. All of us are vulnerable to faults, foibles and failures. A man should never be ashamed to own up that he has been in the wrong, which is saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.

I Thank You
Gratitude is an exquisite form of courtesy. People who enjoy the companionship of good, close friends are those who don't take daily courtesies for granted. They are quick to thank their friends for their many expressions of kindness. On the other hand, people whose circle of friends is severely constricted often do not have the attitude of gratitude.

Count On Me
A friend is one who walks in, when others walk out. Loyalty is an essential ingredient for true friendship; it is the emotional glue that bonds people. Those that are rich in their relationships tend to be steady and true friends. When troubles come, a good friend is there indicating you can "count on me."

Let Me Help
The best of friends see a need and try to fill it. When they spot a hurt they do what they can to heal it. Without being asked, they pitch in and help.

I Understand You
People become closer and enjoy each other more if they feel the other person accepts and understands them. Letting your spouse know in so many little ways that you understand her/him, is one of the most powerful tools for healing your relationship. This applies to any relationship.

I Love You
Perhaps the most important three words that you can say. Telling someone that you truly love them satisfies a person's deepest emotional needs; the need to belong, to feel appreciated and to be wanted. Your family, your friends and you, all need to hear those three little words, "I love you".

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